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Old 10.18.2007, 03:29 AM   #1
atsonicpark
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Post the worst lyricists ever! (with examples)
Brian from Placebo:
"YOUR LITTLE SISTER HAD A BLISTER WHERE I KISSED HER ON HER THIGH."

Fred Durst [though I think his lyrics are hilarious, they're still awful]:
"You say you want your money back but you're denied cuz your brains fried from the sac."
"I'm sick of being aggravated, I'm glad I'm hated, that's what happened back in Columbine!"
"No doubt I'd love to sniff on them panties now. I'm sorry, so sorry (damn you so hot). Your beauty is so vain (damn you're so hot!)."
"HEY! IT'S THE E TRUE HOLLYWOOD STOR-Y! IT'S THE E TRUE HOLLYWOOD STOR-Y!"
"...And, God, I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

And his best, this is fucking POETRY:
"I remember high school, man i hated high school
It was like prison with bullies always putting me down
Just a little skater boy they could pick on
I learned to forgive'em, now i got the balls they can lick on
I loved sneakin' out when my mom was asleep
With my gothic girlfriend makin' love in the creek"

Billy Corgan - [I don't even know where to begin with this guy, all of his lyrics offer the same 5 themes: "she", "the moon", "the world", "love", and "alone"]... uh...

Okay.
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Old 10.18.2007, 04:04 AM   #2
Torn Curtain
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Early Bowie (his lyrics got better in the late 70ies):

"Time takes a cigarette"

"I'm an alligator"
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Old 10.18.2007, 04:24 AM   #3
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I think Martin Gore from Depeche Mode is the unbeatable king of dumb lyricism.

Just try this, it's just hillariously bad:

Question of Time:

Ive got to get to you first
Before they do
Its just a question of time
Before they lay their hands on you
And make you just like the rest
Ive got to get to you first
Its just a question of time

Well now youre only fifteen
And you look good
Ill take you under my wing
Somebody should
Theyve persuasive ways
And youll believe what they say
Its just a question of time
Its running out for you
It wont be long until youll do
Exactly what they want you to

I can see them now
Hanging around
To mess you up
To strip you down
And have their fun
With my little one

Its just a question of time
Its running out for you
It wont be long until youll do
Exactly what they want you to

Sometimes I dont blame them
For wanting you
You look good
And they need something to do
Until I look at you
And then I condemn them
I know my kind
What goes on in our minds

Its just a question of time
It should be better
Its just a question of time
It should be better with you
Its just a question of time
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Old 10.18.2007, 05:15 AM   #4
the ikara cult
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Borrell
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Old 10.18.2007, 05:24 AM   #5
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Ooh, that's tough. Depends on what you define as good or bad. Frank Black can write some cringe worthy shit IMO. He's just luck that the Pixies rock enough to make up for it.
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Old 10.18.2007, 05:26 AM   #6
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that one awful song by LFO (??) that said something like "billy shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets" and "I like girls that wear abercrombie and fitch"

I'll find lyrics later.
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Old 10.18.2007, 05:41 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Torn Curtain
Early Bowie (his lyrics got better in the late 70ies):

"Time takes a cigarette"

"I'm an alligator"

I like those lyrics.
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Old 10.18.2007, 05:45 AM   #8
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I know someone who LOVES Weezer (lame) and listens to them all the time.

Some of the lyrics off that new album are god awful.

Or really lyrics from any of their albums.

Damnit, I hate Weezer.
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Old 10.18.2007, 05:46 AM   #9
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Oh, and I've always hated Bob Dylan lyrics.
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Old 10.18.2007, 05:47 AM   #10
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Oh, and Franz Ferdinand lyrics and Interpol lyrics.

Gang of Four and Joy Division are miles above those cheap imitators based on the merits of lyrics alone.
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Old 10.18.2007, 05:49 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SpectralJulianIsNotDead
Quote:
Originally Posted by Torn Curtain
Early Bowie (his lyrics got better in the late 70ies):

"Time takes a cigarette"

"I'm an alligator"

I like those lyrics.

To me they're forced, it shows they're literally collage.
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Old 10.18.2007, 05:55 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SpectralJulianIsNotDead
Gang of Four and Joy Division are miles above those cheap imitators based on the merits of lyrics alone.

Yes. Regarding Joy Division Ian Curtis's lyrics have a strong poetic quality in my opinion.
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Old 10.18.2007, 06:38 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZEROpumpkins
Ooh, that's tough. Depends on what you define as good or bad. Frank Black can write some cringe worthy shit IMO. He's just luck that the Pixies rock enough to make up for it.

URIAH HIT THE CRAPPER is one of the greatest lyrics ever!
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Old 10.18.2007, 06:53 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SpectralJulianIsNotDead
I know someone who LOVES Weezer (lame) and listens to them all the time.

Some of the lyrics off that new album are god awful.

Or really lyrics from any of their albums.

Damnit, I hate Weezer.

I think that 95% of the lyrics on Pinkerton are really clever and funny, shit I can even relate to some songs (not pink triangle).

I agree that later Weezer is some fo the worst shit ever.
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Old 10.18.2007, 07:26 AM   #15
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Lyrically? Or you just don't like Weezer. I don't care what people say, their first 2 albums were awesome IMO.
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Old 10.18.2007, 07:34 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZEROpumpkins
Lyrically? Or you just don't like Weezer. I don't care what people say, their first 2 albums were awesome IMO.
Agreed, a lot of people that I wouldn't have expected to also really like this album. Dudes I know into early death metal and obscure psych have expressed love for those two albums.
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Old 10.18.2007, 09:16 AM   #17
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odd, i think pinkerton, musically and lyrically and structurally and sonically, is one of the best albums of all time. in my top 20 for sure. I'd take Pinkerton over almost anything. Who the hell can deny "Tired of Sex" or "Across the Sea"? Just good music. Blue is also good. their later stuff.. I mean, their first two albums (and b-sides!) are AMAZING, but.. .hmm.. their other albums are listenable but... yeah. That's about it. Listenable.

I think Frank Black is a really interesting lyricist.
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Old 10.18.2007, 11:45 AM   #18
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Nick Cave's "From Her To Eternity" contains this gem:

This desire to possess her is a wound
And it's nagging at me like a shrew.
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Old 10.18.2007, 11:56 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by _slavo_
I think Martin Gore from Depeche Mode is the unbeatable king of dumb lyricism.

Just try this, it's just hillariously bad:

Question of Time:

Ive got to get to you first
Before they do
Its just a question of time
Before they lay their hands on you
And make you just like the rest
Ive got to get to you first
Its just a question of time

Well now youre only fifteen
And you look good
Ill take you under my wing
Somebody should
Theyve persuasive ways
And youll believe what they say
Its just a question of time
Its running out for you
It wont be long until youll do
Exactly what they want you to

I can see them now
Hanging around
To mess you up
To strip you down
And have their fun
With my little one

Its just a question of time
Its running out for you
It wont be long until youll do
Exactly what they want you to

Sometimes I dont blame them
For wanting you
You look good
And they need something to do
Until I look at you
And then I condemn them
I know my kind
What goes on in our minds

Its just a question of time
It should be better
Its just a question of time
It should be better with you
Its just a question of time

this stuff is pure genius man! compared to durst? shiiit.
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Old 10.18.2007, 11:56 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZEROpumpkins
Lyrically? Or you just don't like Weezer. I don't care what people say, their first 2 albums were awesome IMO.
Amen to that.. Blue and Pinkerton own, I'd say two of the best albums in the 90s.
I don't think the lyrics are that bad, though it seems he was thinking of how to make the songs 'catchy' when writing the lyrics.
I mean common "I've got posters on the wall, my favorite rock group Kiss. I've got Ace Frehley, I've got Peter Criss..." sick line
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