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Old 11.14.2006, 08:48 PM   #101
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im buying plane tickets for this christmas because few people travel on that day & so it's dirt cheap. "thank god" for stupid holidays!
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Old 11.15.2006, 08:39 AM   #102
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Originally Posted by Iain
Washing Machine probably knows the place I'm talking about...top of Whitchurch Road almost opposite Currys. Oops...I mean North Road....not Whitchurch.

Oh God! In Fact That House made me hate Xmas!!!
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Old 11.15.2006, 01:33 PM   #103
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Glice
Get more presents than the Christians.

Actually we drink a lot and watch shit tv same as everyone else. Oh, and we eat children from the local nativity pageant.
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Old 11.15.2006, 01:46 PM   #104
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Originally Posted by Confucious is sex
Actually we drink a lot and watch shit tv same as everyone else. Oh, and we eat children from the local nativity pageant.
This will do a lot for inter-faith understanding. See everyone? The Jews are just the same as us. Why, they even eat mawling children, just like us! And they get to wear really cool hats. You go Judaism! Woo!
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Last time I was in Chicago I spent an hour in a Nazi submarine with a banjo player.
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Old 11.15.2006, 05:40 PM   #105
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Listen, if some fucker doesn't know irony when he/she/it sees it then they can fuck off. Jews are not some weird freak sideshow, they are cunts, lovers, musicians, artists, chimney sweeps etc same as everyone else. And if that had been Shylock's speech then we'd all have been a lot less bored by Shakespeare in school. Ha ha, he said 'cunt'.
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Old 11.15.2006, 05:43 PM   #106
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Well I for one love Christmas.
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:01 PM   #107
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I am christmas.
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:06 PM   #108
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Confucious is sex
Listen, if some fucker doesn't know irony when he/she/it sees it then they can fuck off. Jews are not some weird freak sideshow, they are cunts, lovers, musicians, artists, chimney sweeps etc same as everyone else. And if that had been Shylock's speech then we'd all have been a lot less bored by Shakespeare in school. Ha ha, he said 'cunt'.

The problem with irony is that if you use irony in response to something that was ironic, and a further post is possibly being ironic, but also possibly not being ironic in an ironic fashion, or even, ironically, not being ironic in an ironic fashion, then one loses trace of which was irony, which was serious, and which was serious irony. Ironically, I have no idea what I'm saying any more, which is probably more bathetic than anything else.
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Originally Posted by Savage Clone
Last time I was in Chicago I spent an hour in a Nazi submarine with a banjo player.
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:07 PM   #109
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Step Father Christmas
I am christmas.

No, you're bored.
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:12 PM   #110
Step Father Christmas
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Norma J
No, you're bored.
With two kids to my account,one rather demanding job and an often irate ex-wife i have very little to get bored about,sweet soul.You seem like quite an aggressive gipsy by the tone of your post.Am i wrong?
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:13 PM   #111
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Step Father Christmas
With two kids to my account,one rather demanding job and an often irate ex-wife i have very little to get bored,sweet soul.You seem like quite an aggressive gipsy by the tone of your post.Am i wrong?

Porkmarras?
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:15 PM   #112
Step Father Christmas
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Originally Posted by HaydenAsche
Porkmarras?
I'm sorry??
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:16 PM   #113
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Step Father Christmas
With two kids to my account,one rather demanding job and an often irate ex-wife i have very little to get bored about,sweet soul.You seem like quite an aggressive gipsy by the tone of your post.Am i wrong?

Nice work sir.

Incidentally, if you're step-father Christmas, does that mean that I'm getting two lots of presents this year?
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Last time I was in Chicago I spent an hour in a Nazi submarine with a banjo player.
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:17 PM   #114
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I love you more than the real father Christmas. Don't tell him though. But that fat bastard hasn't replied to a single one of my letters. AND the fucker keeps stealing my brandy.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage Clone
Last time I was in Chicago I spent an hour in a Nazi submarine with a banjo player.
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:19 PM   #115
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Glice
The problem with irony is that if you use irony in response to something that was ironic, and a further post is possibly being ironic, but also possibly not being ironic in an ironic fashion, or even, ironically, not being ironic in an ironic fashion, then one loses trace of which was irony, which was serious, and which was serious irony. Ironically, I have no idea what I'm saying any more, which is probably more bathetic than anything else.

No dahling, I was agreeing with you, we're sound. We are going to abandon these humourless fuckers and sail to Cheltenham. 'Bathetic' is a great word, well done you. (And i actually know what it means too, well done me)
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:32 PM   #116
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Step Father Christmas
That's more like it,sweet little boy.The fat bastard you speak of seems like wasn't always oh so kind to those kids,so i finally decided to beat the hell out of him in order to bring in peace and the good spirits at this very special time of the year.Will a case of brandy and a box of cigarettes do the trick for you?

Aye. Although I'm more partial to Irish whiskey. Marlboro reds are my brand. And if you could introduce me to some college girls, that'd be ace.

Thanks Step-Father Christmas [I'm going to hyphenate it even if you're not]
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Last time I was in Chicago I spent an hour in a Nazi submarine with a banjo player.
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:34 PM   #117
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Confucious is sex
No dahling, I was agreeing with you, we're sound. We are going to abandon these humourless fuckers and sail to Cheltenham. 'Bathetic' is a great word, well done you. (And i actually know what it means too, well done me)

Excellent. You win! I didn't realise there was anyone who understood proper wanker's words. I shall use them more often, methinks...
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage Clone
Last time I was in Chicago I spent an hour in a Nazi submarine with a banjo player.
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Old 11.15.2006, 06:42 PM   #118
Step Father Christmas
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Glice
Aye. Although I'm more partial to Irish whiskey. Marlboro reds are my brand. And if you could introduce me to some college girls, that'd be ace.

Thanks Step-Father Christmas [I'm going to hyphenate it even if you're not]
You are welcome Glice.I see we are one articulate little boy and Step Father Christmas likes little boys like that.More whiskey for this adorable little brat and NOW!!
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Old 12.22.2006, 02:38 PM   #119
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well nothing i have seen or heard has changed my mind. ban this terrible festival i say.
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Old 12.22.2006, 04:28 PM   #120
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ok tell me a joke and i might change my mind haha.
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