[Glice]

Originally Posted by space

how do you find it when you need it?

my usual coping skills have left me.

I am in a state of high-flux, with the inability to even begin to think about where I am going to take myself, until time has passed.

I leave for australia to meet the one I love in less than three weeks. my only activities are working out, art and milking time from old job as I can (the ability to do even that is becoming and less and less as time goes by).

I am in a "strange" city (old/new) with no friends, I do not get high and I am trying not to spend money.

silly worries haunt me like never before. maybe they aren't so silly, but worry doesn't serve me right now, and I need to become more calm, focused and, well, happy.

what should I do? or rather, what would you do?

I can't promise to take yr advice, but there's a few clever people around here, so I figured that it couldn't hurt.

ps: the first person to post a Guns 'n Roses video will get neg-repped by every user-name I possess. thanks.

I've always found that sitting down in public is good. Particularly if there's an area with a lot of genuinely homeless people (as opposed to villainous crack-heads), who'll usually be happier after a chat than if you just give them money. You'll find that a lot of homeless people are more interesting than your average person. Of course, this is usually because human tragedy is more interesting than masked failure.

This should have a secondary function of bringing your current anxieties into repose - listening to other people, their problems, can often make your current concerns not so much lessened as communal. You know you're not going to see these people again, and it's surprising the candour you can acquire from strangers.

The more prosaic option is to tie up the loose-ends early - we all know there's something you'll only remember at the last moment. Have you called your family? Is there an old colleague you really should say goodbye to? These sort of things only come up once you've stopped worrying about the more practical things, unless of course you're a prize procrastinator. On this tip, is there anyone you've always wanted to ring up and call a cunt? Now's the perfect opportunity, as you know you won't see them again. Obviously, you're moving on, but there's a chance that bitterness about that one guy may go with you - get rid of it, in one great bridge-burning gesture.

You could start writing - you're moving on; is there anything you want to remember? Not the big things - they never leave you - but those little moments that make you laugh, like a duck falling over in a park or a comically-shaped fruit. Maybe you'll never see another packet of Doritos - cherish those comical Doritos. Write them down. You never know who might be interested in future.

If you're worrying a lot, try and think about why you're worrying, rather than fretting about the state of worry. This is hard advice - we all get more interested in the panic than the cause of the panic. Again, writing down a list of everything that's worrying you may help - and then write a list of everything you're looking forward to. You'll probably find that, once written down, your worries aren't as bad as you think. They may even seem even more silly. Remember, it's fine to be anxious - that's natural - but you know you're moving on to somewhere that'll make you happier.

Patience is a virtue, say the Christians. They may not have everything right, but being patient is something that some of us never learn. Think of this as the last time you'll really have to be patient - if necessary, say to yourself 'I'm going to enjoy this anxiety'.

Did you ever want to learn French, or read about Engineering? In a couple of weeks, you could easily read quite a lot about this. Your public library is probably better stocked than you imagine, and if you're concentrating on something like that, you'll find you're worrying less. I'd suggest something practical, rather than something intellectual - it's easier to put your mind at ease when you're keeping yourself busy.

Most of all, remember - this might be the last chance you get to see America. Try and enjoy it! It's your home-country, and it'll always be a big part of your identity.

I wish you all the best!