[Toilet & Bowels]

Originally Posted by Nefeli

yeah, i m sorry about that.
have you considered to cut stuff down and try and be the one who uses them and not the other way around?
i mean its hard. i reckon that for almost everything (including alcohol), the mood you are before takes the lead and defines the effect stuff will have on you. however, i thought coke is a lift up anyway.

as i have said many times, i was born for drugs, but because of how my mind works i m afraid and i am avoiding them.
i had coke offered to me for over a decade, before i started doing some.




during 2012 i did some, but i do it, in order to stop me from getting wasted with the booze. i havent really felt the wow i m god feeling it gives you, because i really have done very little everytime.
in the sense i had been using it, it can still get 'addictive.




oh yeah, i call it 'white little depression' and lol hadnt realized it, because the feeling was very similar to my ache and 'weight' i feel inside anyway.

hmmm come to think, i havent felt that for some time and i m telling you, it was an almost daily feeling. i must be doing smth right, dunno what it is. it could also be the melatinine that i have started taking before sleep.

I was never someone who took drugs a lot but I enjoy them sometimes and these days because getting older/changes in social groups etc I'm not around them as frequently as I used to be, and it's made me think more about the situations I would take them in, if I do do them now I prefer earlier in the evening before I get drunk at home with 2 or 3 friends. Have been thinking about checking out those websites you can order drugs from to see what happens.