things i ask myself before going out
 

am i gonna meet a chick who's gonna want to dominate my asshole? should i clean it?

yes and yes.

how about i just clean my cock. i already have my shoes on and an anus is difficult to clean in a sink

my aunt never went out with bad underwear because the biggest fear in her life was to get into some sort of accident and have doctors see her ugly underwear.

babywipes.

i have none, shit

also, i clean my ass like a man, with full penetration

none of that baby shit

No wonder the newcomers to this forum are scared

DAVE IS TUMBLR FAMOUS
ahahaha

lol

i ended up way too sloppy to be of any use to any dominating females last night.

how do you know they are scared? is this their first stop on the Internet before diving right in? if so, they deserve to be. if not, then seeing a picture of tumblr_Dave forcing his bearded boyfriend to eat his own poo off of his finger should be no problem at all
^^^the Internet will do that to you.

internet does so many things to me