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-   -   Yeaaaaaaaaaah New Mars Volta Album Out In June!!!!!!! (http://www.sonicyouth.com/gossip/showthread.php?t=30591)

SYRFox 04.24.2009 04:27 PM

Yeaaaaaaaaaah New Mars Volta Album Out In June!!!!!!!
 
NEW SINGLEEEEE YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L2yP25qWgiI http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L2yP25qWgiI http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L2yP25qWgiI

THE ALBUM ONLY CONTAINS EIGHT TRACKS BUT IT MEANS 15 732 PARTS IN WHICH 49873 SOLOS ARE HIDDEN WHICH MAKES ROUGHLY 3.170162725654716 SOLOS PER PART AND AROUND 6237,295162725654716501398423595 SOLOS PER TRACK!!!!!!!! OF COURSE THE PROBABILITY OF HEARING A 5 NOTE SECTION REPEATED TWICE THROUGHOUT THE ALBUM IS OF APPROXIMATELY 0.001375684!! GET YOUR CALCULATORS, COMPASS AND ASPIRIN READY FOR THE NEW MARS VOLTA ALBUM!!

THE CONCEPT OF THIS ALBUM IS BASED ON THE IDEA OF RELEASING AN ALBUM WITHOUT CONCEPT WHICH IS UNBELIEVABLE OF COURSE. THIS UNBELIEVABILITY CREATES A WHOLE LOOP THAT RESOLVES ITSELF AND CREATES A GIGANTIC CHAOS, A DIMENSIONAL FAILURE FROM WHICH THE BIG MONSTER "OUIJDA" GETS OUT AND DEVOURS THE WHOLE HUMANITY... EXCEPT THE MARS VOLTA, WHO HAVE TO COVER ARPEGGIOS FROM HELL BY YNGWIE MALMSTEEN AND FOUR GUITARS BY MICHAEL ANGELO BATTIO AND OTHER SONGS LIKE THAT (LULZ I DUNNO THE TITLES) AND PLAY FIVE THOUSAND GUITAR NOTES PER SECOND SO THAT THEY RESCUE THE WHOLE WORLD AND GET A KISS FROM PRINCESS PEACH!!!!!!!

AMAZING!!! GET READY FOR THE FANTABULOUS OCTAHEDRON!!

SYRFox 04.24.2009 04:29 PM

OMAR SAYS THE ALBUM COULD HAVE BEEN CALLED DODECAHEDRON BUT THEN THE MACHINE WOULDN'T HAVE REVOLVED ITSELF AND SO THEY HAD TO CALL IT OCTAHEDRON!!

SYRFox 04.24.2009 04:32 PM

 


"CAN YOU FEEL THAT OCTAHEDRON BABE"

summer 04.24.2009 04:46 PM

I am so confused by you because you don't seem to like Mars Volta yet you typed all that out. Of course the first post is kind of a rehash of one of your other posts but still.

SYRFox 04.24.2009 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by summer
I am so confused by you

that's because i'm one confusing guy :D
but yeah i think they're the dumbest band ever

pbradley 04.24.2009 04:55 PM

YEAH I HEARD IT'S GOING TO BE ABOUT THE PROCESS OF QUANTUM INDIVIDUATION IN SCHLODENBURG'S HYPERSPACE EQUATIONS AND PAOLO BONACELLI'S LESSER KNOWN ART FILMS FUCK YEAH

SYRFox 04.24.2009 04:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pbradley
Yeah I Heard It's Going To Be About The Process Of Quantum Individuation And Paolo Bonacelli Films Fuck Yeah

HOLY JESUS MOFO SHEET IT SOUNDS SO GOOD
I HOPE CEDRIC REACHES 18000 HZ WITH HIS VOCALS ONCE AGAIN!!!

Derek 04.24.2009 04:59 PM

great thread

atsonicpark 04.24.2009 05:07 PM

More awful bullshit. Pass.

SYRFox 04.24.2009 05:10 PM

NEW MARS VOLTA SIDE PROJECT: THE MARIO VOLTA

 


MARS VOLTA'S OWN TAKE ON CHIPTUNE!! 480 BPM 1/8 HIGH PITCHED 8-BIT SOLOS INCLUDING ATMOSPHERES FROM SALSA, BE BOP, HARD ROCK, PROTO POST GRUNGE, HIP RUMBA HOP AND NEO CLASSICAL POP.

SpectralJulianIsNotDead 04.24.2009 05:10 PM

Great. A new fucking album for every idiot to tell me how "genius" it is.

SpectralJulianIsNotDead 04.24.2009 05:11 PM

The Mars Volta look like the cast from Welcome Back Kotter, except I think the Sweathogs would make better music.

SYRFox 04.24.2009 05:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpectralJulianIsNotDead
Great. A new fucking album for every idiot to tell me how "genius" it is.

that's because you can't enjoy the mars volta without a calculator, protractor, metronome, advanced abstract mathematics notions, erlenmeyers and silver nitrate

SYRFox 04.24.2009 05:20 PM

hyperbolic redox semi equations are what make the mars volta so special

and also the fact that cedric can break glass with his voice

Glice 04.24.2009 05:32 PM

Syrfox, if this was school there'd be a bunch of people standing around you singing "SYRFox and Mars Volta, sitting in a tree/ kay ay ess ess ay en gee!" and you'd be stomping your feet going "no, actually, actually, no, because, actually, I don't, I HATE THEM!" before running off crying.

SYRFox 04.24.2009 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Glice
Syrfox, if this was school there'd be a bunch of people standing around you singing "SYRFox and Mars Volta, sitting in a tree/ kay ay ess ess ay en gee!" and you'd be stomping your feet going "no, actually, actually, no, because, actually, I don't, I HATE THEM!" before running off crying.

no, actually, actually, no, because, actually, I don't, I HATE THEM!

SYRFox 04.24.2009 05:45 PM

I'm crying now. I hope you're happy.

atsonicpark 04.24.2009 05:57 PM

I just think Mars Volta fans should chill out and listen to, like, Koennjihyakkei, Dun, Thinking Plague, Henry Cow, Ahvak, Korekyojin, Ruins, Magma, etc. You know, prog that isn't wanky and awful.

Derek 04.24.2009 06:04 PM

Mars Volta are horrible and everything... but they're just a band and I couldn't really give two shits if people like them.

SYRFox 04.24.2009 06:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Derek
Mars Volta are horrible and everything... but they're just a band and I couldn't really give two shits if people like them.

problem is, people who like them tend to give shit if you like them
most people i know who like mars volta are also the most pretentious people i know

summer 04.24.2009 06:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SYRFox
NEW MARS VOLTA SIDE PROJECT: THE MARIO VOLTA



 


MARS VOLTA'S OWN TAKE ON CHIPTUNE!! 480 BPM 1/8 HIGH PITCHED 8-BIT SOLOS INCLUDING ATMOSPHERES FROM SALSA, BE BOP, HARD ROCK, PROTO POST GRUNGE, HIP RUMBA HOP AND NEO CLASSICAL POP.


You amaze me

Youth_Against_Facism 04.24.2009 08:21 PM

YES! I can't wait! Seriously I can't. Mars Volta rock!!!!

fugazifan 04.25.2009 02:03 AM

yeah, i dont understand the UTTER hate towards the mars volta here. im not crazy about them, but they are defiantly talented. the first album and FTM were excellent and had really good songs on them.
it just seems weird for people here to write them off as pretencious, i mean COME ON, everyone here is pretencious, andmost bands that are listen here are completely pretencious.
i mean say what you want about 4'33 its still pretencious to notate silence and then sue someone else for using silence in one of their works....

Death & the Maiden 04.25.2009 02:44 AM

Having never listened to Mars Volta, I clicked on one of those links in the original post and watched a few more videos of theirs. And they don't seem to be nearly as bad as people say they are. Not great, but not bad.

_slavo_ 04.25.2009 04:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SYRFox
HIP RUMBA HOP


haha

atsonicpark 04.25.2009 06:44 AM

No, their music is seriously awful. Why all the hate? Lemme tell you: First of all... They're not even that talented. The drummer/bassist on all the stuff I've heard is really good, but the main guitar player is a joke. Endless boring solos followed by shitty riffs and extended protools-effected guitar layer noises (which are also boring). Who cares. The singer is absolutely atrocious. So, he can hit a high note. Who gives a shit? Also, not that this matters, but his lyrics are the worst I've ever heard, ever, in all the history of recorded music, worse than Slipknot, Hedpe, Mudvayne, ICP, etc. I mean, I gotta give points to the guy for knowing how to read a thesaurus but still. As I mentioned elsewhere, the guitarist insulted fans and non-fans of this band in a Guitar World interview. Look it up somewhere, I'm sure you can ask about it on any mars volta message board and get the full text. He said something along the lines of, "People come up to me and say 'hey it's cool you wrote a 30 minute song' and I'm like 'fuck you. That's not what our band is about. That's only one aspect. I can't stand people who only like our technical side. Or our long songs. We mean more than that. Fuck people who don't get it." blah blah blah. The most assholeish, idiotic, pretentious moron to have ever existed... Most of their songs have no flow. Again, endless copy-and-paste protools editing doesn't really equal good songwriting. Yeah, they play the songs live, but don't they, uh, "evolve" the live version of the songs into extended jam sessions? That's because they don't know how to write songs! Overly compressed endless Rush/Prince/Ricky Martin bullshit jam session garbage. That is a big trap for prog bands who want to pack in endless amounts of time changes, riffs, and so on... how do you make the songs flow organically? Well, listen to most of the bands I mentioned earlier in this thread and hear that, hey, it can actually happen! I just find their music to be unlistenable garbage. I've listened to their first few albums a few times to try to see if there was anything I was missing. And, no, I'm not missing anything. I can usually say something good about all bands, but I will go ahead and say I think the Mars Volta have almost no redeeming qualities. In fact, I think they are the worst band I've heard in my entire life.



Anyway, I don't agree with all of this (for example, I think the breakdown at 3:20 into the first song on this album is the only good moment in any of their songs; too bad it lasts about 5 seconds), but this is hilarious:
http://www.somethingawful.com/d/your...mars-volta.php

Final thought: If people somehow genuinely like this stuff, I seriously reccomend checking out some of the bands I mentioned a few posts back...

Youth_Against_Facism 04.25.2009 07:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark
He said something along the lines of, "People come up to me and say 'hey it's cool you wrote a 30 minute song' and I'm like 'fuck you. That's not what our band is about. That's only one aspect. I can't stand people who only like our technical side. Or our long songs. We mean more than that. Fuck people who don't get it." blah blah blah. The most assholeish, idiotic, pretentious moron to have ever existed...


So your saying if someone came up to you and said 'hey it's cool you wrote a 30 minute song' you'd be like 'Yeah cool thanks! You don't care what our music is about you only care how long it goes for, not anything else!'?

atsonicpark 04.25.2009 07:28 AM

Heh. If I were in the Mars Volta, I'd be happy that anyone was interested in any aspect of the music I create.

Either way, that's beside the point, he literally said "fuck you" to people who don't "get it". That alone makes him a douchebag and kind of explains the continued hatred.

Youth_Against_Facism 04.25.2009 07:38 AM

I'm actually guessing more people like The Mars Volta than Sonic Youth because The Comatorium has 30200 members and nearly 3000000 posts, were as SYG has not even 20000 members and not even 1000000 posts.

No disrespect to SY though.

Youth_Against_Facism 04.25.2009 07:38 AM

So don't assume no one likes The Mars Volta just because you don't.

atsonicpark 04.25.2009 07:44 AM

Not sure when I assumed that or why you assumed that I assumed that. Hell yeah more people like the Mars Volta than SY. More people like tons of awful garbage more than SY. So what?

Anyway, I don't care who likes this band. Really couldn't care less. I just think they're the worst band ever and I was explaining why. No biggy.

Glice 04.25.2009 07:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark
No, their music is seriously awful. Why all the hate? Lemme tell you: First of all... They're not even that talented. The drummer/bassist on all the stuff I've heard is really good, but the main guitar player is a joke. Endless boring solos followed by shitty riffs and extended protools-effected guitar layer noises (which are also boring). Who cares. The singer is absolutely atrocious. So, he can hit a high note. Who gives a shit? Also, not that this matters, but his lyrics are the worst I've ever heard, ever, in all the history of recorded music, worse than Slipknot, Hedpe, Mudvayne, ICP, etc. I mean, I gotta give points to the guy for knowing how to read a thesaurus but still. As I mentioned elsewhere, the guitarist insulted fans and non-fans of this band in a Guitar World interview. Look it up somewhere, I'm sure you can ask about it on any mars volta message board and get the full text. He said something along the lines of, "People come up to me and say 'hey it's cool you wrote a 30 minute song' and I'm like 'fuck you. That's not what our band is about. That's only one aspect. I can't stand people who only like our technical side. Or our long songs. We mean more than that. Fuck people who don't get it." blah blah blah. The most assholeish, idiotic, pretentious moron to have ever existed... Most of their songs have no flow. Again, endless copy-and-paste protools editing doesn't really equal good songwriting. Yeah, they play the songs live, but don't they, uh, "evolve" the live version of the songs into extended jam sessions? That's because they don't know how to write songs! Overly compressed endless Rush/Prince/Ricky Martin bullshit jam session garbage. That is a big trap for prog bands who want to pack in endless amounts of time changes, riffs, and so on... how do you make the songs flow organically? Well, listen to most of the bands I mentioned earlier in this thread and hear that, hey, it can actually happen! I just find their music to be unlistenable garbage. I've listened to their first few albums a few times to try to see if there was anything I was missing. And, no, I'm not missing anything. I can usually say something good about all bands, but I will go ahead and say I think the Mars Volta have almost no redeeming qualities. In fact, I think they are the worst band I've heard in my entire life.


The problem I always get when reading this is that (and I'll bold and italics this bit) every single one of those criticisms could be applied to the music you like. I'm not saying you like one sort of music, but proggy, spazzy (multiple time-signatures with low musical content), bad-lyriced, guitar-based rock is your stock-and-trade. For me, all your criticism above says is that MV are the most absolutely perfect music for you.

This isn't particularly a criticism of Mr Park - there's a 'friend' of a friend that is 'just like me' and, of course, we completely hate each other. Famliarity breeds contempt and all that.

And of course, there are bands that 'do what MV do but better', but that's really not the point, we're not talking about quality (you certainly don't), we're talking about the haecceity of MV.

</mithering>

atsonicpark 04.25.2009 07:50 AM

Well, I attempted to do two things with my post. Explain the overall hatred of the Mars Volta and explain my hatred of the Mars Volta, all in the same post. So, let me simplify: The reason I personally do not like them is that they don't make songs that I enjoy listening to in any way, shape, or form.

...Also, prog is hardly my stock in trade. I haven't really listened to much "Zany time signature muzak" for a long time, with a few high quality exceptions. I'm a minimalist man now! You hear that, world?

Youth_Against_Facism 04.25.2009 07:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark
The reason I personally do not like them is that they don't make songs that I enjoy listening to in any way, shape, or form.


That's better. :p

atsonicpark 04.25.2009 07:55 AM

Holy shit.

Just half an hour ago (2:30 PM CST) the official announcement was made on The State's website: HELL HAS FROZEN OVER!!!!!! "THE STATE" TO BE RELEASED ON DVD JULY 14 !!!!

Here are a few of the specs listed on the brief announcement video:

5 disc set
Full commentary on *every* episode
Tons of never-before-seen sketches and Much More!!

Youth_Against_Facism 04.25.2009 08:01 AM

I think your clock broke 30min ago was 10:30pm AEST.

Glice 04.25.2009 08:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark
I'm a minimalist man now! You hear that, world?


I'll tell you what - you can cut out a few years of shit minimalism and just start listening exclusively to early music and Feldman. It'll save you a lot of heartache and prevent you from listening to Gorecki. Double-win.

greedrex 04.25.2009 08:17 AM

I have never ever listened to Mars Volta.
Does that make me cool or ignorant?

[Sandbag] 04.25.2009 08:24 AM

you dont miss much. they're ok.

joe11121 04.25.2009 10:48 AM

I have never listened to them... Going on youtube right now... The Widow is playing... Some annoying shit is playing... Singing starts out meh... Screaming starts, click off the site.

He isn't an awful singer. He isn't good, but isn't awful. He shouldn't scream though.


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