you send the best drunken texts EVER

Really ? <3

"yo vince, I'm happy for you and I'mma let you finish but billy mays was the best pitchman of ALL TIME"

"I DON'T NEED THAT SHIT. I'm billy fucking mays motehrufuck"

"lolwqut"

"no shit. bobbeh you better now be using my phiome to play betsy like that fucking VCHHEDDER HAEAD"

"I'm looking for ahamerr annd aa tapndye"

"IT'S TIME TO PARTY! LET'S PARTY @3"










yes. really.

blop blop ba doo bop

OK, SO, i WINN AT LIFE PRETTY MUCH.

you could say that.

Billy Mays ya'll.

i said that andnow I can fin d my tv remote and I'm out teh boozes

I lol'd. I haven't seen you this drunk in a LONG time

you've never 'seen' me drunk. you need to recitfy that. next time you trek across country, stopp by and we'll get tore up/// like I am not.

Drink list:
Voka gimlet
vodka lemon
screwdriver
vokda gimlet
scredriver
vokda lemon
vodka lemon
vodka lemon

you know what I meant. psh.
also, if I visit your casa there needs to be andrew WK

dude, threre so would be....I Get Wet x 9000

DO NOT WANt...right now...

that's what she said

No, no homo, me and A. WK could be like best friends or whatnot...
I'm suddenly enamored with me shoulder.

you should get a shoulder parrot and name it andrew WK.

Np, no birds.Bi8rds shit all over the fucking joint.

get a stuffed one. dead birds don't shit.






... I don't think they do, anyway.

THEY BETTER fiucking not. I can't be having an undead bird up in this piece.