portland is awesome & has a bunch of zen places man

just get a fucking apartment & move there already.

Ha, ha. Yeah, I'm not quite ready to go into zen-monk-style poverty for it, though. I'm too attached to the doe-ray-me.

Something will work out. It is not our destiny to remain in the land of the rebel yell.

ha ha. i remember saying "noooooooooooooo!!!" when you vainly tried to rationalize south carolina. i saw that from a million miles.

now walla-walla? please man. too much twin peaks.

apartment living is not poverty man! it's awesome! no yard work! and no excuse for your kids to go live back at home! :D

Oh, no, I agree. We want apartment living, in fact. We're very ready for it. I'm just saying we'll still need money to pay the rent and keep the lights on. Job first, then move.

if you can figure out how to get anywhere in that confusing street layout..

yeah, they do have an abundance in white people up there dont they.. an apparantly a rising somali population. The INS moves people to the craziest places, St Paul has one of the highest Ethiopia populations in the country!

speakin of the crimes
i think i will get cheesed and draw
i did a pic of tom green the other night ill show ya
its incomplete though

I know.

haha being burnt out
if i smoke too much i turn into a retard

speaking of retards

holy shit i did speed
not meth, like regular amphetamine
the only way i can describe it is i felt like an 8 year old retarded girl on crack which is fun
just for fun, for no particular reason other than that i'd never done it before
i'm still fucking tweaked out. jesus shit christ.

and i have never been so distracted in my entire life and that's not supposed to happen? like i got a cheeseburger and i just stood there with it in my hand talking for like 20 minutes straight even though i meant to eat it
and i had a cig in my hand meaning to light it and i just ran around with an unlit cigarette in my hand for like a half hour

^^^Speed is fun, but the come-downs can be horrendous. I just used to talk 25-to-the-dozen about all sorts of crap, none of which I could remember afterwards.

And for the 25th time this month from me, here's a clip dedicated to youuuu:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n96kBt_PsV4

it was so fun
like way more fun than doing blow
i didn't expect to be so distractable though
and EVERY FUCKING THING that comes to mind, i had to verbalize it
i was crashing out so bad this morning but i couldn't go to sleep
i don't remember anything i said but i got into this really ridiculous intellectual conversation about god knows what with my friend, some psychological kind of shit
i think i just went from being a pothead sloth to a tweaker in like less than a day

ahaha re: fall video, i'm still fucking wired and i'm drinking coffee and then ima drink a red bull or three
also i love that song

SOMEONE SHUT ME THE FUCK UP

Melly in speed action many years ago:

"Yeah, y'know the thing about politics and religion, is, like, they are SO encompassing of y'know the universe andallsortsofthings - where's mycigggie ohI...justthinkIburnedmyselfagain".

(If anyone releases my ampheta-rants on the internet, I am so busted...

just smoking a cigarette was (and is still) so. fucking. enjoyable.

i have ADD like you wouldn't believe normally. i mean this was nuts. i can't believe i never did it before yesterday. i've been awake for 28 or 29 hours.

Ahhh, Speed. My cruel mistress. Last weekend, took a fair old amount at a club, and then on leaving I could NOT decide where I was going to go and who I was going to hang out with, the fact that both had pros and cons absolutely THREW me whilst on speed. I actually at a point considered throwing myself out in front of a car to avoid making the decision. In the end a coin was flipped on my behalf. The worst thing is, no one else seemed to be anywhere near as high as I was. The moral of the story is: stay AWAY from decisions on speed.

The lack of sleep will get slightly better when and if you take it again. When I first started taking it I'd take it on saturday and not sleep until Wednesday. However, now its alot better and I can sleep the day after, though more realistically the day after that.

TINH - Or hash: "Uh, shall we go and get something to eat?"
*20 minutes passes*
"Uh, I dunno....man, I've got the munchies. Anyone want to get a kebab?"

i still have not gone to bed and i don't feel tired at all. i've been awake for something like 32 hrs or some shit.

i don't feel all tweaked out anymore though, just really burnt out like i killed a lot of brain cells.

The old adrenalin will kick in later on tonight - but you will sleep for a long time afterwards, I tell thee. Thank Buddha for your perm vacation, eh ;)

Yeah, it's that physicality of speed which makes it so powerful, and quite frankly is why I like it so much. On pills, very much a drug of the mind, when the drug wears off the mind comes down and the body with it. However, speed I feel is very much a drug of the body, you can FEEL tired mentally but there still seems to be a motor powering away in your body.

no way could i live such a ridiculously hedonistic lifestyle and hold down a job. no way.

TINH- yr right about it being completely physical. i still have weird adrenaline-rush feeling in my chest but i feel completely normal if slightly retarded.

TINH - amphet sulph was the thang for me when I was 20, but also glugging cough medicine gets fairly similar effects too. Still, nothing beats a mushroom high for me - that is a power Win all the way.

Talking of speed (I won't be doing any this time... probably) we're hitting the Slimelight again this time next week, you down with that vibe Mellster?

i want to do speed and acid at the same time

does it really, how interesting... any particular type of cough medicine?

You could possibly do it, but the burn out would be horrible. There's a lot of post-Acid House drug casualties in London - very sad :(

But then again, yer a young 'un, so enjoy the goddamn ride while you can :)

I was supposed to be doing that tonight, but my psy-trance rave didn't materialise.

i could have a job and still smoke weed all the time just because i've always done that
but like being totally strung out or speeding no WAY could i do it

Benylin - takes awful, but works a treat. Warning: don't take if you feel pissed off - I'm usually a very placid person, but made the mistake once of drinking it whilst exhausted - I wanted to fight everyone. Not a good move on my part.

so slimes melly? see previous post?

for some reason i can't take benadryl (for allergies, although i did take a whole box of it once and it was WEIRD. weirdest drug experience i have ever had in my life.) because i get super nasty and abusive and aggressive. i don't know why though.

i also noticed that i'm unusually nice to people on speed.

Yeah, partying stoner style is basically "normal" behaviour at my work. People have been booted out for being cokeheads though, due to being aggresive/completey unreliable....

Yeah, speed makes me really happy too. Ditto coke, though I don't like what it does to other people. I've taken downers, and I become totally unpleasant - worse than an aggresive pissed person.

Well, alot of people take Speed to cope with the demands of a full time job. Like my old religious studies teacher, for example.

^^^Jesus on speed? Now that's a religion I would follow!

i'm alright on opiates and downers, just kind of my normal self but a lot less edgy and quieter
me on speed is like me on a really good day x 200000000
julian was laughing his ass off at me being so jolly and talkative

it's not the same if i do coke though, it's like me on a not so good day plus extra paranoia and edginess. like i won't be in a bad mood, i'll just be a lot more reactive to things that don't really matter and be a bitch to everyone. honestly comparing coke and speed just based upon my own experience i don't know why anyone would ever do blow.

I've never done blow for all the reasons you've mentioned. Shame you had to try it to find this out.

come to think of it there are even more reasons to do speed instead of coke. cocaine is more expensive and lasts for like 15 minutes. and the other reasons. and it's easier to get ripped off on it.