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-   -   whatcha doin? (http://www.sonicyouth.com/gossip/showthread.php?t=33868)

knox 10.25.2009 12:50 PM

I know this man who got married to an american but apparently same sex marriage might be accepted but doesn't give him the right to get a greencard? they had to get a lawyer to sort it out and spend loads of money.

as for what i am doing.

what do you do when you feel so shit about yourself, you have a massive horrid hangover (and didn't even have fun), even moving hurts and its almost like uve had a lobotomy?

Dead-Air 10.25.2009 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Genteel Death
Thanks. I was going to come to the states this year for different reasons, I was to get married to a guy from Minneapolis I met here in London. I've had second thoughts about it and called the wedding off early because I didnt think it would work. The plan is still on as far as visiting is concerned. The only thing is that we are just friends and keep in touch almost every day. He is visiting next year in May or June.


Wow. So you totally get my crazy international crush/friendship then. I just talked to her on the phone for the first time ever. I think I'm headed for exactly the kind of turmoil you mention above too. I have no idea if we are the ideal lovers or ideal friends. Of course the romantic in me hopes for both, but there's this little realist on the other shoulder, and I don't know which one has the horns and which one has the halo.

Dead-Air 10.25.2009 12:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knox
as for what i am doing.

what do you do when you feel so shit about yourself, you have a massive horrid hangover (and didn't even have fun), even moving hurts and its almost like uve had a lobotomy?


two things have ever helped me through that situation: cats and pot.

Genteel Death 10.25.2009 12:58 PM

The plan was for him to move to the UK. I know this American dude who went through hell in order to marry his partner in Liverpool, move there, and live happily forever after. They had to shell out a big amount of money (for them).

Dead-Air 10.25.2009 01:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Genteel Death
The plan was for him to move to the UK. I know this American dude who went through hell in order to marry his partner in Liverpool, move there, and live happily forever after. They had to shell out a big amount of money (for them).


And did they find a justifiable amount of happiness?

I'm convinced that if I never kiss this girl it would still be worth everything to meet her and go places with her. I'm so ridiculously infatuated, it makes no sense at all.

nicfit 10.25.2009 01:16 PM

Am tryin' to make room for stuff to put stuff into in a room with no room for other stuff.

deflinus 10.25.2009 02:03 PM

being a lazy piece of shit for once

!@#$%! 10.25.2009 02:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Satan
you guys didn't have separate bank accounts?



rule number one.

never, ever, ever entangle yourself financially with another person.


ha ha, good advice for judge judy customers in general ("i signed my name for her cellphone!"), but being married is a different story-- it is in fact an economic contract, when you clear away all the bullshit ritual.

dead-air pointed at some of that but there's much more to it-- e.g., we're not cooking little individual meals for each person, or keeping 2 fridges, or keeping 2 rooms at separate temperatures, or measuring how much hot water each consumes, etc.

living alone is of course the best way to avoid these entanglements, but once you're a family you're all in the same boat--- that's why you should watch carefully who you marry and why-- "love" (read: hard dick) is not cause enough for this-- you can get that without the contract. "being in love" is a temporary illness, and it's no base for any kind of long-term contract.

the problem with many marriages is that they are based on deluded "romantic" ideologies rather than reality. "but i love him!"-- no, that's no reason to marry-- that's reason to fuck their brains out-- you marry someone cuz you wanna start a fucking tribe with them and you're ready to pay the price and stake your future on the enterprise.

Genteel Death 10.25.2009 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dead-Air
And did they find a justifiable amount of happiness?

I'm convinced that if I never kiss this girl it would still be worth everything to meet her and go places with her. I'm so ridiculously infatuated, it makes no sense at all.

God yes! They had been apart for a long time, in the end the wedding itself only meant they could be together. Keef is also an awesome musician who played, amongst others, with Faust. They really are a great couple. Oh, and they met on the internet.

knox 10.25.2009 05:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dead-Air
two things have ever helped me through that situation: cats and pot.


my mind is absolutely allergic to pot. it is ridiculous. one would think that im a real schitzo, but id be just stoned.

as for the infatuation, GO FOR IT.

mil_pl 10.25.2009 05:54 PM

goin' to bed, take care

Sonic Youth 37 10.25.2009 05:56 PM

Reliving the album of my 11 year old self, Americana by The Offspring. This is due wholly to having a kick ass night last night that included the Time Warp and late night food runs. I still know every word to this album

nicfit 10.25.2009 05:56 PM

tryin' to destroy a supervirus from a friend's pc.
fuck.

Dead-Air 10.25.2009 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knox
my mind is absolutely allergic to pot. it is ridiculous. one would think that im a real schitzo, but id be just stoned.

as for the infatuation, GO FOR IT.


Yeah, at least you get something interesting to read, eh? But then at least I get something interesting to live, so I'm thinking - yes.

knox 10.26.2009 07:25 AM

a similar situation turned out to be the best thing that ever happened in my life.

but you never know, i guess what im saying is we gotta take risks.

mental note.

Keeping It Simple 10.26.2009 03:54 PM

Suffering a stinking cold.

Dead-Air 10.26.2009 11:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knox
a similar situation turned out to be the best thing that ever happened in my life.

but you never know, i guess what im saying is we gotta take risks.

mental note.


Yeah, I'm not sure she's as up for the risk as I am though. Which is pretty damn fair. She'd be the one who'd have to take a huge one and go some place where she knows nobody but me. I can't leave my son behind, so I won't be doing that. Too bad, because I'd be pretty up for it otherwise (though I have a good career I really shouldn't leave too). She wants to collaborate on a cover of "Expressway to Yr. Skull" now, so I'm thinking ride the music wave for awhile and see.

knox 10.27.2009 07:02 AM

I know people who left their children in a different country. But you're right, I wouldn't do that.

Satan 10.27.2009 08:09 AM

just woke up
drinking coffee + doing bong hits
then going to work

deflinus 10.27.2009 08:50 AM

bong hits are part of a complete breakfast


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