is it okay to fuck your guitar player?

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The other side of this is that older musicians are nearly always stuck in their boring ways. Most younger people are stuck in their boring ways, but at least they have the courtesy to ocassionally be heroically crap at it.

My golden rule is either play with very, very talented people or people who can't play at all. It's the imbetweeners (ie, nearly everyone) who are the troublemakers.

-Do fuck whoever you want to fuck.If the music is shite it wont change a thing anyway.

Only if you're plowing his sweet ass with a dildo.

try again.

O RLY? will you star in the next lillith fair?

Only if you're plowing his sweet ass with a dildo..

-Do avoid swear words in your lyrics.They are cheap as fuck and wont make you come accross as tougher in any possible way.

Actually, I've changed my mind - If you're thinking of forming a band, don't. Go out and get a job and a decent hobby. Don't whatever you do form a band, you're probably shit and don't have any ideas. The fact that there are some very few bands that aren't shit is merely an anomaly inexplicable to human minds.

best advice i've heard in years.

Now wait a minute.


I'd have a problem with rule number one.

Never fuck the instruments.

girls: WAX.

Please refrain from saying "We have CDs/LPs/T-shirts for sale at the merch table" whilst onstage.

EVERYBODY KNOWS. We all have product for purchase.
The merch table is right there in front of our eyes.

Of course, this can all be avoided by adherence to my "no talking to the audience" rule.
A "Thank You" at the end of your set is acceptable. That's just good manners.

girls: rip out your tampon mid set and verbally assault the crowd.

unless they are used sparingly (as in one time every 10 songs)

boys, if you are in a band with girls, halfway through your last number...rip off her shirt and then pull out your wang and piss in her mouth.

girls, stand on the drum riser, bend over and fart in your drummers face.

the most important rule, just have fun.

never have only 1 influence, it makes you a ripoff band

I do think it's okay to wear band shirts or claim influences. If it cheapens the music, then at least you're being honest about it. I'm not going to go onstage, pull a Thurston move, and then pretend like it was mine.

The swearing thing I actually agree with. There are only a few swear words. If you have to use one in every line, pick up a copulating thesaurus, for rut's sake. They're fine in moderation, though.

My two rules are: If the name of a song is something generic like "The Wrath of Hell" or "Sadness," please refrain from actually saying the name of the song onstage. Or ever. It detracts from the value of the song by approximately 68%.

And if your singer feels the need to cuss for no reason between songs and act like a badass because he's nervous, punch him in the face. Seriously. That would be incredible, and everyone would admire you for it.

-Acknowledge people's opinions but carry on doing what you intended to do regardless.People form bad bands therefore they can be as disposable as them.