dear pookie,
my toenails are currently swimming pool blue. what color should i paint them next?

how odd.

WONDERTWIN POWERS ACTIVATE!

I'm sorry, but if the quality of these questions doesn't improve, I'm going to have to start being selective about the ones I answer.

Have you ever thought about a career in comedy?

Please give me the following information so that I can give you an accurate assessment:

What colours predominate in your wardrobe?
Do you prefer bright colours or soft/muted colours?
What colour are your eyes?

Answer the same questions as Cantanky for an assessment.

Dear Pookie,

What sort of bread do ducks prefer to be fed? Ciabatta or brioche?

For personal reasons I would prefer not to divulge my identity, but I hope this will not affect your willingness to answer my question.



EDIT - Too late. Someone just fed them some cheap white bread from Tesco, and they now look rather poorly.

Well tell this "someone" that they shouldn't do it again.

Brioche is best, because of the lovely buttery taste which ducks thrive on. However, they often make the mistake of dunking for too long and this results in the brioche breaking up and sinking to the bottom of the pond.

Ciabatta has the exact opposite problem. Too little soaking and the bread becomes a choking hazard. The solution is to either lightly butter the ciabatta beforehand, or throw it directly into the pond, some distance away from the ducks. That way, by the time they reach it, it will have taken on a sufficient quantity of water.

Ah indeed, the rise of the supermarkets! Yes, others are in fear and under pressure from the seemingly unstoppable rise of Tesco. I think regulations should be put in place. Just for starters:

1) Supermarkets are too big, so they should be forced to sell off part of their businesses.
2) They are taking over from pharmacies, legal services etc., so licensing should be introduced.
3) There should be a lower cap on market share to prevent supermarkets from merging and buying other businesses.
4) They have too much control of the supply chain, and so should be forced to sell off their wholesale divisions.
5) Supermarkets buy land which remains unused in order to block competitors. They should be forced to sell this land.
6) Ban below-cost selling and price flexing to enable local businesses to compete with them.




No


Yes

Dear Pookie,

Should I part my hair in the middle, on the left, or on the right?

Thanking you in advance for your assistance,
Bobby "Bobby" Charlton

If I ever can't make up my mind, I combine foods. Today I'll be having sushi pizza.

Try it.


It's a windy day today, so all three.

i took a blood test yesterday to find out if i'm anaemic what will the result be?

An old saying my gran used to say frequently:

An iron deficiency, a lack of dietary proficiency,
If you want some relief, eat plenty of beef.

Hope that helps.

dear pookie,

why do i love you a little after reading this thread?

mmmm,

girl with a gun

Dear Pookie,

Why doesn't my brain work anymore? Why do I find it a chore to decide what to have in a sandwich let alone decide on the important issues facing my country.

Yours,

Robert 'Bobby' Mugabe.

Don't fight it, embrace the love.

To be serious, I dab a little fragrance behind the ears of this thread, and it usually has the desired affect.

I've had experience with a lot of blood stains, and nothing works better than Dove brand bath soap (the white bar). It's best not to use warm or hot water on stains, but Dove soap takes out stains that are dried up, hard and even stains that have been soaked in hot water. Just put the stain under running warm water, scrub with the soap, rinse, and it's gone. If the stain is not large, it's not even necessary to throw the clothing into the wash after being cleaned with the soap.

Of course, if you don't have Dove soap, you can simply wash the stain under cold water with normal soap. You can also use an old toothbrush to scrub the stain with hydrogen peroxide. However, peroxide will take the color off clothing and doesn't remove it immediately. You will still have to throw it in the wash and scrub it yourself, though the peroxide helps a little.

Or alternatively, take the precaution of wearing red clothes as often as possible (and I see from your picture, you've thought of that already!).

I'm afraid it's one of the down sides of being a brutal dictator.

On the plus side, you never have to wait for a seat in restaurants.

Dear Pookie,

This is the first time I ask you a question, but do you think that Cindy Sherman is great, or is she a mere hack?

I do admire her greatly, but my friends think I am being fooled by profiteers in the arts world, and should focus on sports instead. After I refused to watch a football game to attend one of her exhibits, they banned me from their beer-swilling soirées.

Where before I enjoyed their camaraderie, now I am shunned for my beliefs. Is it worth it to suffer this way?

Yours,

Adolescent Runt Tortured For Art's Greatness

As you youngsters would say, Art>Sport.

So the worst art is better than the best sport.

Plus what Miss Bunbury said.