Badump-bump.
"I'll be here all week, folks!"

Take my wife...

...please.

Pardon my laziness and intrusion as I am far beyond reading the context of these posts, but regardless, I wanted to take this moment to ask pookie how Seth and the rest of the family are doing?

That's far too sensible a question for this thread, so I've resurrected the sonic children thread.

dear pookie,

i want your wife. lovely soft face.

leonard salt, milton keynes.

dear pookie,
are you glad this thread is back?

Dear Pookie,

How do you keep your skin so smooth at your advanced age?

All the best,
Mavis

Pookie, please help.

I have lost all direction in my life.

Petronella Dachshund

Dear Pookie
why did you neg rep me?

I am very emotional about reps.

You need the "Plead with Pookie" thread. He only answers questions in ths one.

Dear Creepy Crappy,

Pookie is currently indisposed, but in view of the potentially life-threatening situation in which you find yourself, I have been called upon to answer in his absence.

You should on no account "attempt a bit of DIY". Electricity is very dangerous, and not to be played with. You should instead wait patiently for a qualified person to come and rectify the situation, and while you wait you should try to make do with what little light is available to you and write a list of jokes that seem suitable to the occasion.

Regards,
Pookie's self-appointed deputy

Dear Pookie,

I have no control over my hands. Sometimes I find myself in lessons thinking about effects pedals, then I look at the screen of my computer and find that my hands have logged onto my account on a messageboard and have posted something totally pointless in my name. I have a doctorate in economics, and I find it very distressing that my hands are misrepresenting me in this way.

I have considered cutting my hands off so that they cannot do this any more, but they are operating as a team and neither of them will do the deed.

Please help me. What should I do?

youre right there.

Are you going to answer these questions, Pookie? There are people suffering trauma here, you know. And Sarramkrop is still sitting in a semi-darkened room.

No, but I feel obliged to answer. I just can't stop myself.

Virgin's blood, one cup after every meal.

My bad mood + you making a foolish comment = neg rep. Sorry k-b :o .

Dear Pookie,

Where do you find virgins in Basingstoke?

Yours inquisitively,
Mavis

I presume that because any idiot can change a lightbulb, you must have what they call, the raging horn for the electrician. To avoid mess, I'd wait for him before attempting to "DIY".

I'm sorry, by the time I get to the end of your post, I've forgotten what you said at the beginning.